Friday, October 31, 2014

Dear Mama Who Dropped Her Baby

Ill never forget it. 

A couple of months ago, I was sitting on the bed with my son as we had recently celebrated the milestone of sitting up. I leaned over the side of the bed to check a Facebook notification that had popped up. 

As soon as I looked up from my phone-in slow motion, might I add-I saw my beautiful little son fall backwards, over the edge of the bed.

Gasp. My heart sank. Worry set in. 

"Is he ok? Is he hurt? Omg, what the hell was I thinking? That stupid notification could have waited!"

There was silence for a second, followed by a loud, bellowing cry. Not the same cry that he makes when he is hungry or when he wants to be held. This cry was terrifying and painful.

I started crying as I watched my baby cry. Then he stopped and looked at me with a big smile, but tears were still flowing down my eyes. I promise, I must have felt like the worst parent alive. I felt so selfish that I did not touch my phone for the rest of the evening, except to call my husband to cry ferociously about what had happened.

I monitored him for any changes and he was just perfectly fine. Praise the Lord. I cannot even tell you the things that ran through my head as soon as I heard the "thud" of my poor baby hitting the floor.

I am so happy that my son was not hurt. As moms, we always hear that our babies will roll off the bed or couch at least one time in our entire motherhoods. But you also hear the occasional horror story of a child who fell just the wrong way that caused an injury or, even worse, death.

Dear mama who dropped her baby: it's okay
Give yourself a break. 
You are not a bad mom.
You are not a failure.
You are doing your very best that you can.
Mistakes happen.
Forgive yourself.
Learn and move on.

It is a blessing that God chose to make babies so resilient and malleable. 
Because this happens all the time-to anyone.

Keep on keeping on, mama. 
And remember: you are a good mom.

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